Mar 22, 2012

Confessions Of An Angry Momma, Part 2

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Yesterday, I started this series called Angry Moms.

If you didn't get a chance to read it, I encourage you to go back and take a look. 

It's about feeling angry all the time at just about everything, and not understanding why.  And feeling guilty because you do.

But today, I want to tell you, it's okay. 

It's okay to admit that you're angry.  You don't have to suck it up.  You don't have to push that feeling down inside and pretend it doesn't exist. 

Because in case you forgot, you are a human. 

A person with real feelings and emotions. 

And anger is an emotion, just like any other.  It's as normal as feeling happy or excited.  And by ignoring your anger or pretending it isn't there, you are giving it way more credit and time than it deserves.

I heard a quote that said, "If you are harboring anger or bitterness, you have made it an idol, (or God), because it is now the thing that is consuming your mind."

That's what you are allowing anger to do if you try to ignore it instead of deal with it.

{Warning:  we're now at the warm and fuzzy part.  But I hope you'll just go with it...}

If you are a woman who is experiencing this right now, I want you to stop right here.  I want you to take a moment and tell yourself it's okay to feel angry.  Give yourself permission to admit that, without guilt or shame.  If you want to pray about it, do it!  If you just want to talk to yourself, do that.  If you need to journal, go for it!  Whatever it is that you choose to do, just let go of the guilt and shame.

Have you done it?

If so, good for you! 

If not, why?  Why do you think that you have to punish yourself for feeling angry?  It's my hope that if you haven't done it, that you will take some time for yourself, and really consider that.

And now we come to the real question. 

Because you're thinking, 'Well, that's great and all, but now that it's okay to feel angry, what do I do with it?". 

And the answer is: once you've been honest about it, you have to deal with it and then let it go.

Not gonna lie, it's gonna be hard.

Because the truth it, sometimes it's just easier to be angry. 

Right?

It's easier to spank your child and get instant results.  It's easier to slam your fist on the table and yell because things aren't going your way.  It's easier to curse the cashier at the drive thru because she got your order wrong.

All of that is easier than taking a hard look at yourself and realizing that you chose this.

That's right.  You chose this life. This life with kids, and activity schedules, and minivans, and homework, and diapers, and dinner menu's, and laundry.  You chose all of that.  And while you love so much of it, there is so much you didn't bargain for.  And that makes you furious. 

Have I hit a nerve?  Does any of this ring true for you? 

If so, then we are on the right track.  Because that means you are being honest and you know that things need to change.

We are gonna help each other with that. 

Tomorrow, I will be sharing my personal story of being an Angry Mom, and how I am overcoming it. Perhaps some of my story can help you. 

I will also be giving you some ideas on what you can do to begin your own process of discovering why you are angry and what you can do about it.

I hope you'll come back, and maybe even share your story with us. 

Until then, Love and Hugs!

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